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Esteem

beliefs we have about ourselves, the qualities, skills, ways of feeling or thinking that we attribute found in our "self image" or "self-image." The "self" is the assessment we make of ourselves on the basis of feelings and experiences that have been incorporated throughout life. We are ready or fools, capable or incapable, like it or not. This self-assessment is very important since it largely depend on the realization of our potential and our accomplishments in life. In this way, people who feel good about themselves, they have a good self-esteem, can tackle and solve the challenges and responsibilities that life poses. By contrast, those with low self-esteem tend to limit themselves and fail

People are complex and very difficult to define in a nutshell.


2. How did self-esteem?

- The concept of self is developing slowly throughout life, each stage contributes to a greater or lesser degree, experiences and feelings that will result in an overall sense of worth and disability. In childhood we discover that we are boys or girls, we have hands, legs, head and other parts of our body. We also discovered that we are beings than others and that there are people who accept us and reject us. From those experiences pranas ¬ tem of acceptance and rejection of others is when they eat ¬ zamos to generate an idea of \u200b\u200bwhat we value and what they will or let ¬ lemos wayside. The boy chubby since childhood may be more an adult happy or unhappy adult, the final tie that ¬ ne a lot to do with the attitude of others has demonstrated ¬ ence their excess weight in childhood.

- During adolescence, one of the most critical phases in the development of self-esteem, young people need to forge a strong identity and insight into their potential as individuals, also requires social support from others whose values \u200b\u200bmatch their own and be valuable to move forward with confidence to the future. Is the time when the boy goes from dependence on people who love (family) to independence, to trust their own resources. If childhood has developed a strong self-esteem, it is relatively easy to overcome the crisis and reach maturity. If you feel worthless is in danger to seek safety on roads missing seemingly easy and rewarding, but ultimately destructive as drug addiction.

- Low self-esteem is related to a distortion of thought (wrong way of thinking). People with low self-esteem have a very distorted view of what sin really, at the same time, these people maintain stringent requirements perfectionists about what they should be or accomplish. The person with low self-esteem has a dialogue with herself that includes thoughts as

• overgeneralization: As an isolated setting up a universal rule, generally, to anywhere at anytime: I failed once (into something concrete)! Whenever we fail! (Is assumed like us to fail in all.)
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• Designation: used derogatory terms to describe oneself, instead of describing the error specifying the timeframe when it happened: I just got awkward (I am)!.

• Polarized Thinking: Thinking of all or nothing. They take things to extremes. It has absolute categories. It is white or black. You're with me or against me. I do good or evil. Not accepted or are known to relative valuations. Or is it perfect or not.

• self-incrimination: One is guilty of everything. I have my fault,! I should have noticed!.

• Customization: We assume that everything has to do with us and compare us with all the other negative. ! Have a face, what I've done it!.

• Reading of thought: suppose that does not interest the others who do not like you, think badly of you think ... without real evidence of it. Are assumptions that are based on things pilgrims and untestable.

• Fallacies of control: you feel you have total responsibility to everyone and everything, or feel have no control over anything, which is a helpless victim.

• Emotional reasoning: If you feel this is true. We feel lonely, without friends and believe that this feeling reflects reality endlessly comparison with other moments and experiences. "If I'm a really pointless" because "feels" that is indeed the

IMPROVING SELF-ESTEEM

Self-esteem can be changed and improved. We can do several things to improve our self-esteem:

1. Turn negatives into positives:

Never lose the will to think positive, everything seems invested poorly or not has a solution: Negative thoughts




"Do not talk"
"I can not do anything!"
"Do not expect too much"
"I'm not good enough" alternative


Thoughts "I have important things to say"
"I have success when I put my mind"
"I will make my dreams come true"
"I'm good!"

2. Do not generalize

As already mentioned, not to generalize from the negative experiences we have in certain areas of our lives. We accept that we have had failures in certain aspects, but this does not mean that in general, and in all aspects of our lives we are "disastrous."
3. Focusing on the positive
In connection with this, we must accustom ourselves to see the good qualities we have. We all have something good from which we can be proud, we must appreciate it and take it into account when we evaluate ourselves.
4. Become aware of the achievements or successes
One way to improve our image associated with that "look good" is to make us aware of the progress or success we had in the past and try to have further success in the future. Ask the students to think about the more success they have had during the past year. Tell them that we must all recognize in ourselves the ability to do things well in certain areas of our life and we must strive to achieve the success we want for the future.
5. Do not compare
All people are different, we all positive and negative qualities. Although we see "worse" than others on some issues, we shall surely be "best" in others, so it makes no sense not to compare ourselves, we feel "inferior" to others.
6.
trust ourselves to trust ourselves, our capabilities and our opinions. Always act according to what we think and feel, without being overly concerned about the approval of others.
7.
accept ourselves is essential that we always accept. We accept that, with our strengths and weaknesses, are primarily important and valuable people.
8. Strive to improve A good way to improve self-esteem is to try to excel in those aspects of ourselves that we are not satisfied, we want to change those aspects better. It is therefore useful to identify what we like to change about ourselves or what we would like to achieve, then we set goals to achieve and strive to carry out those changes.



Develop-improvement projects

An important part of our self-esteem is determined by the balance between our successes and failures. Specifically, to achieve what wish to see our needs met gives positive emotions and increases self-esteem.

It has been suggested as a way to improve self-esteem striving to change things we do not like ourselves. We will work on a method that can make these changes easier. This method consists of four basic steps:

Steps to get what you want.

1. Consider a clear and specific goal.
2. Define the tasks to be performed to achieve it.
3. Organize your tasks in the order they should be done.
4. Implement them and evaluate the progress achieved over time. Let us briefly

each these steps:

First step: Consider a clear and specific goal.

A "goal" can be anything you want to do or achieve. Consider a goal of clear and concrete support to succeed because it helps us identify what we want we get
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The goal that we propose has to satisfy certain requirements. Should be a goal:
- sincere, something I really want to do or we want to achieve.
- STAFF, not something that is imposed by an outsider.
- realistic, we see that it is possible to achieve within a relatively short time (few weeks).
- DIVISIBLE, we can determine what steps or things we do to get it.
- measurable, we can see what we have accomplished and what we need to catch up.

Examples:

- Get a good grade in a subject
- Become more popular
- Getting along with siblings
- Playing sports
- Save money

Step Two: Establish the tasks to be performed to achieve it.

Once you have finalized the goal they wish to achieve, ask them to think they would have to do to get it. Not everything is done in a day to get better in every aspect that you propose you to make small efforts.

Put the example of cyclists participating in the Tour of Spain. The goal of many of them is to win the race. But this will have to pass along three-week stages (stages of plain, mountain stages, time trial).

Step Three: Organize your tasks in the order they are needed.

If you attempt to perform all tasks at the same time, it is very likely not get anything. To achieve a goal is very interesting to sort the tasks to be performed and establishing a work plan.

Once you have the list of tasks to perform request being ordered. The order can be established logically, according to the temporal sequence in which they have to do (to make a house before the roof will have to make the foundation) or, if the tasks do not require temporal sequencing, you can start with the simplest tasks and require less effort, leaving for last the most difficult or expensive.

Step Four: Put them up and assess the progress achieved over time. Once

staff prepared the draft would be committed to it and put it into practice. To get to do that is important to be evaluating their efforts. This can be difficult to do yourself, but it is relatively simple if you ask a family member or friend to help us evaluate our progress.

Let's see an example in which a person produced a draft personal development to overcome shyness:

Personal Project Example

1. Goal: Overcome with shyness.

2. Tasks to achieve:

- Greet people you know
- Join peer groups at recess
- Start conversations with colleagues
- Start conversations with strangers
- Ask questions to Professor